Tuesday, March 20, 2012

CRYING MY WAY TO THE HOSPITAL...

Isaiah is hospitalized again at CHOP for uncontrolled abdominal pain and trouble breathing. He went to the ER on Sunday, just to be sent home the same day with no resolution. Early Monday morning, Isaiah's nurse woke me up at 5:30am because he was writhing in pain even after 2 doses of pain meds. He was having trouble breathing. I could hear fluid in his lungs, and he had mild retractions with grunting. I was able to reach his surgeon via email and she had us bring him back down to CHOP to be admitted.

So far, no one knows why Isaiah is having uncontrolled abdominal pain. He continues to retch, has bile backing up into his tubing, and has not moved his bowels in 2 days. There may be a blockage, but we won't know til after his cat scan tomorrow (xrays have been negative). No 3 year old should have to endure this much pain. He just cries or retches or just sits around because playing/laughing causes too much pain. Watching him is pure torture and I wish I could take away his pain, so does Chris. This is why I cried my way to CHOP. Isaiah should be running and jumping and enjoying life, not spending his days in pain lying in a hospital bed.

Please pray for all of us. This particular surgery (partial Nissen) with hospitalizations have been incredibly hard on all of us. Josiah was crying the other day saying, "I'm scared." He is worried for Isaiah and often states, "I hope I get to see my brother again." No 5 year old should carry these types of worries. He should be allowed to play and laugh and wake up every day in his home with his family. Every time Isaiah is hospitalized, Josiah needs to go to someone else's house. His scheduled is disrupted and he is separated for days, sometimes weeks, from us.

Pray for a miracle that somehow, someway God will move and touch Isaiah's body and allow our family to be back together soon. Constant separation and constant stress is taking a toll on our marriage, our family, and on each of our spiritual relationships with God. Seeing His goodness in all of this is incredibly difficult. I don't understand the purpose for Isaiah's suffering--so in turn, I question God's sovereignty. I want to wholeheartedly tell my children about God's awesomeness and goodness, but I can't do that right now, and it's killing me.

5 comments:

  1. Honestly, I don't even know what to say to all of that, except I will be praying for Isaiah and your family. I can't even fathom the torn emotions you must be going through. You must be so drained. Wish I had magic words for you. Hang in there. With love, Keadren (Mergen) Flynn

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  2. Praying for you guys. We are localish (Lansdale) so please let me know what we can do, even if it is just make a meal for you. Praying and here to help.

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  3. I wish there were words of comfort I could give to you, but there are not. Wishing you much love and comfort and praying for Isaiah to be pain free very soon and home with his family where he belongs. If there is ever anything I can do.....
    With love,
    Joanne Vasquez
    (Premier Designs)
    xxxxxxxx

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  4. Joy,

    I'm so sorry your little man is going through this pain. Over the years, I've checked your site now and again to see how he is doing.

    I'll be praying for him and you all through this.

    God is good, all the time. I'm sorry that the fog of your situation is making it hard for you to realize this. Remember, WE don't have to FEEL good to know that HE IS GOOD.

    It's good to tell your children that you don't know WHY things are happening the way they are, but you do know that God works all things well for HIS glory. Isaiah 55:8,9 May you come forth as gold.

    With Love,
    the other Joy from your RN class
    joyinktm-at-yahoo.com

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